I just got a shady piece of 'scam' mail in my (snail) mailbox today. It came on an index card-sized piece of blue paper, and promised luxury vehicles, a cruise, and/or outrageous gobs of cash, among other things. I could simply throw the damn thing away, but I'd rather pull a
P-p-powerbook, or find some other way to inconvenience the idiots behind this. Any ideas? Of course, there's much
[BEGIN Contents of Card]Return Address:
AWARDS VERIFICATION CENTER
2400 W. PIONEER PKWY, SUITE 210
ARLINGTON, TX 76013
Stamp Area:
PRESORTED
FIRST CLASS
U.S. POSTAGE
PAID
PERMIT NO. 1520
ARLINGTON, TX
My Address Area:
ARL-TP3 137970979 - 0052
06272006
P1IGMA5H01
************AUTO** 3 - DIGIT 018
Nathiel Arnold [My name, misspelled]
[My actual address, redacted to protect my privacy]
[Bar Code]
The Other Side:
Dear Nathiel,
You are an official prizewinner in our NEW MERCEDES, BMW, PORSCHE, or $40,000 CASH promotion. We have been unable to contact you, therefore, in compliance with the program regulations, this notice is being forwarded to your attention.
We are holding your choice of a luxury 4-day Royal Caribbean Cruise for two with meals and entertainment included, value $1,398 or pre-paid round trip airfare and two nights accommodations for two to your choice of Las Vegas/Orlando, value $1,250, plus one of the four guaranteed prizes: a new MERCEDES BENZ M-Class, BMW X5, PORSCHE Cayenne or $40,000 CASH, a $1,500 Shopping Spree, Exotic Island Adventure, $806 value or $500 Cash. To avoid forfeiting your status as a recipient, please call toll free at 1-888-XXX-XXXX WITHIN 72 HOURS and arrange for a time for you and your spouse to visit and claim your prizes. There is no obligation to purchase anything. You are guaranteed to receive your prize and gift immediate, in accordance with the requirements of your claim confirmation letter.
Sincerely,
[Signed Name]
[Printed Name]
Awards Director
P.S. Please ask to speak to one of my assistants, Sandra or Kim. They are available M-F, 9:00am until 8:00pm and Sat. 9:00am until 6:00pm Central Time
[END Contents of Card]
My primary goal is to make the people behind this scam wish they had chosen a different line of work
without resorting to harrassment or other illegal means.
I have an inordinate amount of spare time, strong writing skills, and a well-developed sense of vengeance to devote to this task... but very little accessible money, so siccing lawyers at 'em isn't a viable option.
